AHHHHHHHHH !

HOLLYYY DJDIFJDHDHSNSIDNDJDNSKSJDISMDJD SHIIIIIIITTT MOTHERFUCKER. FKSNSKSKDNDISJSHHBSHSJ

HAPPIEST DAAAY OF MY LIFE!
:D :D =D
Dhsncjsnsnfjlndjsksmdjxidjfndkdjdjsj



GAAAAAAAAAHHH!

I LOVE FUCKING LIFE.

GKGMGJFLGKGKFJFKFKGKGKHKFNFJFMDKFKHKDKFGMHMDLDMFKGJG!
I'M SUCH A MOTHERFUCKING IDIOT, I DONT KNOW WHY THE FUCK I DO THIS TO MYSELF.
NONONONO.
I MEAN I JUST GOT OVER HIM
AND NOW I THINK I LIKE HIM.
LIKE GJDJFKDKGLGKFKDKD.
I DONT LIKE EMOTIONS ONE FUCKING BIT.
I'M JUST GOING TO BE EMPTY FOR THE REST OF MY FUCKING LIFE.

HEY! You Look Kind Of Cute In That Polka Dot Bikini GUURRLLL! ( 8 ).

I'm tired.
I just took a nap.
I'm texting.
I'm on facebook, twitter & blogger.
I look like shit.
The second part of Crystal's message hasn't sent yet.
I just poured sugar into Chris' hand so he could wash them..
The second message still hasn't send.
BASSHUNTER IS ON.
I should really reply.
I'm so tired.
And to top all of this pointless shit off,
I'M FUCKING CONFUSED AS SHIT.

Some People Wait A Lifetime For A Moment Like This ( 8 )

blaaaah.
life is so laaame at the moment,
like honestly, i'm just waiting for something big to happen.
like a partaaay, or ANYTHING.
all it is right now is focused on school, because it's the end of the year, this year wasn't even all that great either, met a LOT of new people, some nice, some just . . . yeaaa.
people have changed too. but whatever? i guess i've changed too, because i remember me being the quiet shy girl. . . now i'm just not. xD

oh, and life is also suck-ish at the moment, but not. because of some family news :D
next year i might go to POOOOOORRTUUUUUGAAAAAAAAAAAAL .
things are starting to turn around a little bit.

life 'sucks' because i might like this guuuy, yeaaa. awesome stuff. . . not.
but since we are on this topic, i got over THREE guys in one daaay.
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY ME.
i'm actually really proud of myself. (:



btw, i want to have like a bonfire or go clubbing, or have/go to a party.
kthnksbye.


- nicoleeee

You Wanna Check Into The Heartbreak Hotel, Well Sorry We're Closed ( 8 )

SOMEBODY TELL ME HOW FUCKING PATHETIC I AM! Please.
I can't deal with this anymore... I can't, my brain is saying something different than my heart,
I want you, but I don't. I can't.
I took down the papers I had hidden behind my Lion King picture, I read them, and realized how pathetic I was,
I was really into you.. I smiled, I even cried right now, I put so much effort into loving you,
Who knows if you shared the same feelings for me then?
Maybe a guy and a girl can just be friends.... I wish someone said that to me, last year.
I 'wasted' Quebec on you, but no I don't regret it, because at the time it was what I wanted,
Even though I put up with some major tears, I couldn't decide then and can't decide now if you are really worth it.

someone just call me pathetic, please.

Butterfly Fly Away ( 8 )

Just leave me alone, get out of my thoughts, my memories, i don't want you here anymore, some memories never go away, i get that, but i want you gone, FAR AWAY, i have to put up with you everyday, the memories, the lies that you said, ugh, i just can't deal with this anymore . . .

MALLORCAA ( 8 )

sometimes it takes forever to get to forever, but forever never comes around.

Viva La Vida ( 8 )

I need that one person in my life that I can trust, that I can be myself with, that I can tell all my secrets to and never be judged, somebody to care for me and comfort me when I am sad, I need someone to wrap their arms around me and tell me it's going to be okay, someone I can hang out with, without it being awkward, I can call whenever, someone who can love me, someone to pull me out of my misery, someone to always be there for me.
Unfortunately, there is no one out there for me like this .

:(

Since I Was Lonely From The Start, I Feel The End Is Mine To Write ( 8 )

OMFFFGGGGGGGGGGG.
SO I FINISHED WIDE AWAKE-ish BECAUSE SHE'S NOT DONE WRITING IT YET.
AND OH MY FUCKING GOD, IT'S THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER READ IN MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE.
it didn't leave anything out, like i hate when authors make all this PG crap, but i loved how AG went right into detail, TWO FUCKING THUMBS UP TO THAT ONE . . .
totally in love with Darkward, now i need a conclusion, FAST.

She Was My Girl

i FUCKING love Wide Awake (L)
best fanfic of life .
fer cereal .
but its depressing, in a way . . .

anyways, thats all i needed to say . . .

oh, and i'm adopting the word 'asshat'

+ i feel sorry for all of the people following me on twitter,
because they have to put up with the Wide Awake shit.
haha, but they dig it,
because i bet you they wikied that shit.

FUCKING LOVE DARKWARD (L)

Numa Numa ( 8 )

i don't even know why i am writing this, it's not like i want everyone to fucking know how depressed i am, like they don't already have a fucking clue, no of course not, because i'm always ignored, just another face in the crowd, useless, worthless, basically a waste of space, i don't even know why i fucking bother any more, i'd rather just stay home, and talk to my friends, i have met through facebook, they are the bestest friends i have ever had, some i hardly talk to anymore, but when it all comes down to it, they were always there for me, they knew exactly what to say, they didn't give me some fucked up answer like "it's just a stage, everyone goes through it" because really? thats not what i fucking want to hear, i miss the days, where i coul actually talk to them, have heart-to-heart convos, but now they have probably moved on, and actually gotten lives, while i sit here, left behind, like the fucking lost soul i fucking am, what the fuck am i supposed to do about it ?
it's not like i can go out there and live my life, cause there's always this fucking mental barrier stopping me, i can't go anywhere anymore without fucking breaking down, and today was the second time it happened really badly, like i couldn't fucking handle it anymore, i couldn't take it, i couldn't be at fucking school and seeing all these fucking people, so i fucking left, i doubt i was missed too, because who the fuck would miss me after the way i have been acting these past few weeks, i guess you could say . . . like fuck, NO ONE understands, and i don't want them to, i don't want them to have to put up with and deal with the same shit i am going through, because it's not fucking happy. i only feel happy when i am at home now, sometimes not even, it's because my family knows exactly what i am going through, even though we have fights every now and then, we know why and what its for, instead of some fucking shit like "we all go through it" fuck you. but i need someone outside of my family, a friend even, because you don't know what it's all fucking like, when i say 'fml' i really mean FML, not some fucking gay ass shit, worrying about a crush, like fuck. but then i ask myself, again. . .why the fuck am i telling you all of this, its not like you give two shits about it. and i don't really fucking care if you do or don't . . . you fucking ask whats wrong, i tell you, and then you don't fucking reply, if you are going to be a real fucking person, then atleast reply, instead of ignoring it, and never replying . like shit. just fucking leave me alone if you are going to act like that .

Just Like A Carousel That's Lost Control ( 8 )

Let's blog about Friday (yesterday) :

so I woke up late, agaaaaain, and made it to school RIGHT at the bell, which sucks because I always have to rush,
so I go to science and we got to play with this big static ball... haha, it was goooood times.
ANYWAYS,
I got to music class and we had to do testing on Polly Wolly Doodle, uhm yeaaa .
so someone broke their reed and they needed two dollars, I had one dollar so I gave it to them,
and then Miss Caruana recognized my act of kindness and was all like(to me) :
"You were in our special intentions yesterday" (I was away Thursday)
and I was like okaaaaay, thanks. but the guy who apparently said the intention for me was all like
"NO! I meant another Nicole, who just went through surgery"
so the mrs. caruana is all like :
"OH! nevermind then, it wasn't you"
so there I am sitting, feeling all embarassed and sad-ish..
then the guy has to go add in:
"well. . . We can pray for all nicoles."
fml.
ANYWAYS, so testing began, and stuff, people played..
and then the girl sitting next to me dropped my flute on the ground..
thinking nothing was wrong with it, I just picked it up again,
She did her test and it was fine..
then it was my turn and I couldn't get a sound, so my flute had something
Wrong with it.. apparently.
I took it to the teacher and she tried to fix it, I tried to play an E flat but couldn't get a sound,
then the girl who sits beside me is all like "ITS BECAUSE YOU CANT PLAY"
and I was thinking this in my head : LIKE I'M NOT ALREADY HAVING A BAD DAY! + I kind of hate you .
ANYWAYS, mr.alfano comes in & plays my flute and was all like it's fine, so stop complaining.
So I do my test, and apparently there is something wrong with MY sound, even though when I was practicing before,
I got a perfect sound, SO ANYWAYS, I got sent to a fuckin practice room, EVEN JORDAN DIDNT GET SENT TO ONE
AND HE CAN BARELY PLAY. so I stayed in a room and didn't practice at all,
eventually the period ended, and I just left without checking my marks for the test,
Then I went to religion and we had to take some LONG ass notes, so no time to talk,
but then we got this casestudy on shoplifting but that wasn't too hard.
SO LUNCH CAME AROUND, I went to student services to hand in my summer school form, that was that.
went to the cafeteria for like 3 minutes, then went to the library,
got to listen to my iPod :] & SOME PEOPLE JUST DONT GET THAT I WANT TO BE ALONE AT TIMES.
Then English came around and we had a mockingbird test, and I think I did okaaaaay, but who knows? It's an English test...
so the end of the day has come, and yeaaaa.. nothing special.

and that was my fail of a Friday... basically .

For never was a story of more woe / than this of Juliet and her Romeo

HOLY SHIT !
kso, I finished the play,
and it was AMAZING.
I don't even know if it was like the EXACT words,
but oh em gee, PEOPLE READ IT.
I can't even describe it.
It's a shame that it was that 'short' but I guess it's a play not a novel.
I love Romeo ! haha.
obviously.

anyways, I'm going to read Twelfth Night.

ciao peoples.

-nicoleeeee.

Sooo, i'm staying home again.
it's not that bad, because i don't like school,
but i want to go to music, because i actually like THAT class,
it puts me in a better mood,
but whatevs.

so yesterday, was pretty epic.
i got home, and was like dead tired, so i did nothing.
and then at around 5:30 or so, i was in my room laying down on the floor where i made my bed full of blankets and stuff.
but then i fell asleep, and woke up at 10:30 pm. at first i was all confused and stuff, and was wondering why my mother didn't wake me up AT ALL. then i was all like "that was nice of her" so i went downstairs, i was like STARVING. but i didn't eat anything. it felt really weird, because i usually don't sleep right after school, so i felt like i was getting ready to go to school, but it was like 11:00. so i think i am becoming nocturnal.

last night i also started Romeo&Juliet, its a shame i am reading it on my iPod though, its SOOOOOO amazing, seriously. and i don't even know if they are the right words to the play or not. i am almost done. . .i'm on act 4 i think.
but when i finished that play i'm going to read Twelfth Night, because i have this whole Shakespeare app on my iPod.
its amazing.
anyways,
i'm gooooing.
byeee.

New Layout

i lava my new layout (L)
its pretty.
haha, its probably going to get changed in a week or so,
i want to find one of jupiter.
anyways,
going to go. .

It's my life ( 8 )

I'm just another face in a crowd, nothing special at all .